In a world that prizes instant results and quick-fix solutions, the concept of spiritual transformation often feels elusive—or worse, relegated to a checklist of religious activities. Brandon Cook, co-founder of The Bonhoeffer Project and pastor, challenges this shallow approach with his deeply practical and profoundly insightful guide, Learning to Live and Love Like Jesus: A Discipleship Journey for Groups and Individuals.
This isn’t a book to be rushed. It’s a “long-soaking” resource, a deliberate, 18-chapter (or 52-reading) journey designed to rewire the heart and reorient the life around the model of Christ. Cook’s core message is that true Christian discipleship is not about ‘getting closer’ to Jesus through ritual, but about being so completely transformed that we are empowered to live for others and love as Jesus loved. It is a roadmap for moving discipleship out of the lecture hall and into the trenches of everyday life, culminating in a life of generous, outward-focused action.
This review breaks down the book’s 18 chapters into the five transformative parts laid out by the author, offering a comprehensive look at how this guide serves as an essential tool for personal and group growth.
Part I: Discipleship Pictures
The journey begins by establishing a clear, challenging picture of what Christ-centered transformation actually looks like, moving away from popular, performance-driven models. Cook argues that many church programs fail because they ask the wrong questions, focusing on individual spiritual feelings rather than communal, outward action. This section re-establishes the radical nature of following Jesus.
Chapter 1: The Misconception
Directly addresses and dismantles the false, individualized models of discipleship that focus on self-improvement instead of radical surrender.
Takeaway
Discipleship is not a program; it’s a reorientation of our entire existence toward Jesus’ mission.
Chapter 2: The New Vision
Presents the vision of discipleship as a comprehensive apprenticeship where the goal is to live and love like Jesus in every aspect of life.
Takeaway
The focus shifts from information (knowledge) to transformation (character).
Chapter 3: The End Goal
Defines the destination of the journey: being fully empowered to love others unconditionally, breaking free from self-centeredness.
Takeaway
The measure of a disciple is not how much they know, but how much they love.
Part II: How Are We Transformed?
Once the destination is clear, Cook dedicates the next part to the mechanics of change. This section is vital for readers who have felt frustrated by cycles of spiritual enthusiasm followed by relapse. Cook roots transformation in the dynamic interplay of three key elements, presenting a sustainable model for genuine, lasting spiritual growth.
Chapter 4: The Dynamic of Change
Explores the essential partnership between God’s grace, our intentional practice, and the power of the Holy Spirit.
Takeaway
We don’t change ourselves, but we must position ourselves for change through spiritual disciplines.
Chapter 5: The Gift of Grace
Reaffirms that discipleship begins and ends with God’s unconditional grace. This foundation prevents the journey from devolving into a works-based effort.
Takeaway
Grace is not just a starting point; it is the sustainable fuel for all transformation.
Chapter 6: The Way of Practice
Introduces the ancient, proven practices (spiritual disciplines) that create space in our lives for the Holy Spirit to work.
Takeaway
Practices are not duties but tools to invite God’s presence and power into our daily routine.
Chapter 7: The Holy Spirit’s Power
Focuses on the often-underemphasized role of the Holy Spirit as the catalyst for actual change in our character and behaviour.
Takeaway
The Spirit transforms our internal landscape, giving us the desire and the ability to love like Jesus.
Part III: The Slow Life
Cook understands that genuine transformation is a marathon, not a sprint. This section is a necessary call to deceleration, urging readers to adopt a “slow life” that counteracts the hurried, distracted, and consumeristic pace of modern culture. It focuses on practices that restore attention and rest.
Chapter 8: Counter-Cultural Rest
Challenges the modern idolatry of busyness and work, introducing the practice of Sabbath as a divine gift for renewal and trust.
Takeaway
To live like Jesus means to live from a place of rest, not exhaustion.
Chapter 9: Simplicity and Margin
Explores practices of simplicity and establishing margin (in time, finances, and commitments) to create a life free from excess and anxiety.
Takeaway
A simplified life is a de-cluttered soul that can clearly hear God’s voice and respond to others’ needs.
Chapter 10: The Practice of Silence and Solitude
Highlights the essential need for intentional withdrawal from noise and constant interaction to foster intimacy with God.
Takeaway
Silence and solitude train us to rely on God’s presence, not on external validation or distraction.
Part IV: The Grounded Life
A disciple cannot sustain an outward focus without a deeply rooted inner life. This part guides the reader in cultivating a “grounded life” built on the foundational practices of intimacy with God and spiritual self-awareness. It moves beyond generic religious activity to establishing an authentic, conversational relationship with the Father.
Chapter 11: Prayer as Conversation
Re-frames prayer not as a religious duty or wish-list, but as a genuine, two-way conversation that shapes our identity and will.
Takeaway
Authentic prayer is the engine of the grounded life, keeping our will aligned with God’s.
Chapter 12: Meditating on Scripture
Teaches the discipline of deeply reading and meditating on Scripture (like Lectio Divina), allowing the Word to permeate the soul and reshape thoughts.
Takeaway
The Bible is not merely information; it is the living narrative that grounds our entire identity.
Chapter 13: The Power of Confession
Explores the essential, often uncomfortable, practice of confession—to God and to a trusted person—as the pathway to freedom, healing, and honesty.
Takeaway
Confession breaks the power of sin by exposing it to the light, paving the way for spiritual integrity.
Chapter 14: Corporate Worship and Community
Emphasizes that discipleship is fundamentally a communal enterprise, requiring the shared practices and mutual support of a Christian community.
Takeaway
Spiritual growth is not a solo mission; it is nurtured and tested in the context of the church body.
Part V: The Generous Life
This final, climactic section brings the journey full circle. If Parts I–IV established the vision, mechanics, pace, and foundation of transformation, Part V—The Generous Life—is the inevitable and essential outward demonstration of that change. It solidifies the author’s key message: the result of being transformed is being empowered to live in radical love for the world.
Chapter 15: Stewardship and Trust
Extends the concept of generosity beyond money to include the stewardship of all resources: time, talent, energy, and possessions.
Takeaway
Generosity is a spiritual statement of trust, declaring that God, not possessions, is our ultimate source of security.
Chapter 16: Forgiveness as Release
Presents forgiveness as a necessary, transformative discipline that releases both the offended party and the offender from the bondage of resentment and bitterness.
Takeaway
Forgiveness is the costly demonstration of Christ’s love in our relationships.
Chapter 17: Service and Mission
Challenges the reader to move into active, hands-on service and mission—living out the love of Jesus in concrete, practical ways within their sphere of influence.
Takeaway
The transformed life naturally flows outward into a life bent toward the needs of others.
Chapter 18: Living and Loving Like Jesus
The culmination of the entire journey, summarizing how the inward work results in the outward expression of a truly transformed character.
Takeaway
Discipleship is a daily surrender, a lifelong pursuit that finds its ultimate expression in radical, Christ-like love for the world.
The Author’s Core Message: Rescuing Discipleship from Self-Focus
Brandon Cook’s core message is a necessary corrective to much of modern Christian culture: authentic discipleship is a radical reorientation from self-absorption to selfless love.
He argues vehemently that if your spiritual life doesn’t compel you to genuinely love and serve others, it is not the discipleship that Jesus modeled. He seeks to rescue discipleship from being a Human Paradigm—a self-help program focused on “getting close to Jesus” for personal benefit—and re-establish it as a Jesus Paradigm, where the goal is to be so fully formed in Christ’s character that our natural response is to “live for others and be empowered to love as Jesus loves.”
The book is an urgent invitation to step out of the shallow end of faith and commit to the “long-soaking” process of sustainable character formation, using the ancient practices that create the necessary space for God’s power to work. It is a challenge to stop asking, “How am I doing?” and start asking, “How can I love others?”—believing that the latter question is the true test of spiritual maturity and the only path to a life of vibrant, purposeful transformation.
Learning to Live and Love Like Jesus is not a passive read; it is a workbook for the soul that promises not just a different life, but a completely re-wired identity that finds its joy and purpose in radical, selfless love.
Call to Action
Are you ready to move past the spiritual quick-fixes and commit to the slow, grounded, and generous journey of transformation? Start your journey with Brandon Cook’s essential guide today and discover the profound simplicity of learning to live and love like Jesus.
FAQs
Q1 Who should read this book?
This book is ideal for both individuals and small groups seeking to deepen their discipleship journey.
Q2 Is the book easy to understand for new believers?
Yes, Brandon Cook writes in a clear, relatable way that helps even new believers engage deeply with discipleship.
Q3 Can this book be used for group Bible studies?
Absolutely! Each chapter provides concepts and practices that work well in group discussions.
Q4 What makes this book different from other discipleship books?
It balances practical steps with deep spiritual insights, making discipleship both accessible and transformative.
Q5 What’s the biggest takeaway from the book?
That true discipleship is about living and loving like Jesus—slowly, deeply, and generously.